leaving Sangatta, go to Jogja

After the seven weeks in Sangatta, i finally decided to see the Project Manager to give my report and have consultation about my progress of experiencing working with community. He responded well, and offered to give further assistance for my career development. He even offered me to be permanently in Sangatta if i think that working in Jakarta doesn’t give me so much opportunities and chances. I smiled when he said that.

 I was very enthusiastic of working in site and think that it would be much better than working in head office. After three visits accumulated to be 11 weeks, i decided NO for working in site. After consider many aspects of my life, i prefer working in Jakarta with all its limitation.

I consider access of information, my plan to search postgraduate scholarship with all the application process will be held in Jakarta, and access to see my family in central Java. Not only job consideration, but also the whole package of my life. If i have choices, i choose not to work in site for now.

Tomorrow i’ll be heading for my eight days field break. Leaving Sangatta, go to Jogja. I will take the last flight of Mandala from Balikpapan to Jogja. I need a break, i need a vacation. Good bye Sangatta, here i come Jogja

the seventh week

This is the seventh week i have been in Sangatta. A choice made by me, not by my boss or somebody else. Seventh week of working from 6 am until 5 pm (not to mention the time i have to wake up and sleep at night), six days a week. Anybody can tell me the effect of such rhythm of life to my health? Take a shower at 4.30 am in the morning, and get out in the dark? Tell me if you know. 

I found myself too ordinary, not different, and just the same as somebody else. But now, i don’t think so. The weeks teach me a lot. There are sleepless nights, exhaustion until felt that my body is getting falling apart, difficult people to deal with. Those things tell me that life needs efforts and obstacles keep coming in your life uninvited.

For some reasons, i have to stay here longer than i thought. We still have a critical problem with a community. My boss and the Project Manager have been arguing and they are on a different page to solve the problem. I can see that the condition (or maybe their relationship) getting awkward or love-hate relationship I’m who definitely nobody (not the decision maker) can only observe (or watch?) and wait for their decision.

I’m so envy seeing people happily facing their two weeks field break. I still have to wait for two weeks until have a rational reason to leave. I need to go home to keep my life and soul normal. I want to sleep eight hours or more uninterrupted. I need to go to a book store to keep update. I need to meet people whom i love and love me back.

Experiencing working in site increasing my obscurity for my career plan. I’m not sure what i want for my future career. My life goes nowhere. I still have no answers but i think the universe will answers my questions.

you’d better shut up!

if you had nothing good to say

you’d better shut up!

your scary attitude is contagious

leave me alone

and let me live in peace…..